Dwelling

I love the word dwelling lately. It’s struck a cord with my soul. A dwelling place to dwell…I just instantly go into a peaceful state of mind. A location where no harm, stress or anxiety can get to me. There is no anger, there is no hurt. It’s just a nice place to be. A nice place to meditate on God. A place to enjoy His beauty around me. A place to learn and be corrected without anyone saying a word to me.

God is my dwelling place. His word speaks a loud. And I’m sooo excited to spend a week in the corn fields dwelling with Him and His people. To all going to Cornerstone – it’s easy to get swept up in the non-stop fun, but let’s not forget to dwell in Him. Find God in all that you do.

Dwelling

I love the word dwelling lately. It’s struck a cord with my soul. A dwelling place to dwell…I just instantly go into a peaceful state of mind. A location where no harm, stress or anxiety can get to me. There is no anger, there is no hurt. It’s just a nice place to be. A nice place to meditate on God. A place to enjoy His beauty around me. A place to learn and be corrected without anyone saying a word to me.

God is my dwelling place. His word speaks a loud. And I’m sooo excited to spend a week in the corn fields dwelling with Him and His people. To all going to Cornerstone – it’s easy to get swept up in the non-stop fun, but let’s not forget to dwell in Him. Find God in all that you do.

Oh Cornerstone, how I ___ thee

Well, it’s almost that time of year. The time when Chris and I pack the car to the top with camping gear, music gear, cameras, sunblock, bug spray and Clif Bars. Yup, it’s time for Cornerstone Festival 2009! And to be honest, this has been the first year I have had mixed feelings about it. It may be because last year’s trip was sooo long and ended sooo disappointing because of Chris getting sick and us having to 1-leave very early and 2-drive 17 hours with Chris not feeling well, after a trip to the hospital in the middle of IL, late at night. But anyway, here’s my run down of the good the bad and the smelly.

The good: This is the one time of year that for a week I feel completely free to be myself. Cornerstone brings out the creativity in me, the friendliness, the joy, the excitement…and it’s also the only place I go and (for the most part) don’t judge people. Yup, I said it. I judge people. Whether I like to or not, it happens. But at Cornerstone you just expect people to look, act and think different. I mean seriously, the seminars themselves should tell you that. In one festival you can attend seminars on: what God says about gays, womens roles in the church, modern evangelism, God in movies, the music industry, song writing and poetry, witnessing to the homeless, and missions going on around the world. Not to mention the goth presence, the hippies of the Jesus Village, the sports areas, the underground tent that draws in the heavy metal fans and hardcore group right next to the kid’s tent and the artists area. It’s an amazing gathering of ALL of God’s precious creations. And we obviously cannot forget that booming Afterhours Dance Barn that Chris and I are very much apart of. Ahhh, there is nothing like falling asleep in a tent under the trees hearing the thumping of the club fused with a late night worship band with just a touch of hardcore music. And yes, I do fall right asleep haha. When you hear God in all of it, it’s amazing what music you grow to like. So what else is good? The freshness of time with God. The friends we’ve made over the years and are very much looking forward to seeing in a week. The sunsets of Illinois are 10 times better than NY. The friendliness and acceptance of the people there. The music. Ahhh the music. So many great bands playing at all times.

The bad: The shower houses are horrible. They smell. They’re crowded. The curtains to most showers are torn. And it’s hard to be pretty with no hair dryers or full length mirrors. Sleeping in a tent for 6 days.  It’s fun the first few days – then I miss a bed in a room. Being the only girl (well okay, there are always a few, but you know what I mean!). As much as I really do love the guys that we camp and hang with all week, it’s hard not having a girl to sit around and chat with. I love dance music, but it’s hard for me to be in the dance barn 4-6 hours/night for 3-4 nights. I need my acoustic rock. I need my songwriter music. And THANK GOD I have a husband that understands and respects that. I know if I wasn’t there he’d spend all of his time in the barn so I appreciate that he knows I’m not like that. But, a big part of me feels guilty for “pulling him away” from the friends he only gets to see once/year. The friends that he’s always longing for, DJ/producer friends.

So I guess overall, the good outweighs the bad and that’s why we’re going, and that’s why I’ll be smiling (hopefully) the whole time. In the end, God, his people, and my husband matter more than the selfish “bads” I’ve come up with. I’m excited for the journey, the new people we’ll meet and of course the old friends that we’ve already made. So to Kevin, Dave, Alex, Brooks, Fitzpatrick, Glow, Kairsie, Kendrick, Joel, Jeremy and to whoever else I’m missing — see you soon!!! And Kevin, if you really bring me sweet tea, you’ll be my favorite for the week haha

Oh…Hi! Oh!!!

Get it? OHIO! Ohio and I have a very special relationship. I think I may be the only New Yorker who loves Ohio. There were others – but those that I knew of, moved there. So is that how it works? You live somewhere – you find somewhere else you like better – so you move there? Seems to be. I seem to have that small (haha) factor of waiting for God to tell me to go. So you may be thinking – is this Jess saying that she’s moving to Ohio? Nope – it’s not. Is it me saying that I secretly hope that I do? Yup.

Many people do not understand my obsession with Ohio. Chris didn’t, until we went last summer that is. In my opinion, it’s the best state I’ve been to in the US. It’s a perfect balance of beauty, peace, excitment, and all that the US has to offer. It’s not the middle of nowhere but it’s definitely not a big city place. It’s got the feel of the midwest-country hospitality but doesn’t move as slow as the south. There are cities to visit and work in that are driving distance from miles and miles of open land. The grass is green and the sky is blue. It’s just the most beautiful place I’ve ever been to and it just feels like home when I’m there – even though I’ve never been able to call it home.

So the reason I’m telling you all this? Chris and I are going to Ohio again! We were supposed to stay there overnight going to Cornerstone (in Illinois) and overnight on the way home but our trip has been extended! We’ll be staying 3 days in Ohio, 2 of which in tiny Malta, a town in which Chris’ friend lives with his wife and newborn son, and then another night in familiar Akron, where we stayed last year.

I’m nervous. I’m nervous for 2 reasons. This amount of time in Ohio will either confirm my love for Ohio and cause me to return to NY bummed to be back as I did last year, or it will bring me to the realization that Ohio isn’t the peaceful haven that I have in my head. I know it’s wrong to anticipate disappointment but I guess I am. Hopefully this will change sometime within the next 3 weeks

In case you don’t know my history with Ohio – here it is. My dad went to Ohio University for his undergrad. He loved it there. He played football for the school and the one picture I adore of my father was when he was younger - its a beautiful photo of him in the grass wearing a bright green ohio shirt and sporting a 70s fro. It’s the only time I think I’ve seen him THAT happy and full of life. He transfered out before graduating to go to college with my mom in Brooklyn. Based on his stories I know he doesn’t regret his decision – but he does recognize how different his life would have been should he have stayed in Ohio. Fast forward to my high school experience, where I meet and date a guy who lo and behold – is preparing to go to Ohio University. *Note this is NOT Ohio State, this is a small private school in the same state.* We stay together while he’s there so I went out to visit a few times and I fell in love with not only the school, but the state. The campus is beautiful, as are the people and the town in little Athens, Ohio. I beg my parents to take me out to Ohio to look at schools and discover that one campus is prettier than the next. I applied and got early acceptance into Ohio University as a journalism major with a minor in dance. I was so psyched to be just like my dad and go to his school. I even wore MY Ohio shirt in my high school yearbook! Then senior year of high school got weird and I freaked out. I didn’t want to take a plane to go to school – so I didn’t go. I stayed in NY and went to school in the 3rd cloudiest, rundown, lifeless city in America, Binghamton. Needless to say, I spent many hours regretting my decision but ultimately know that my life wouldn’t be what it is right now if I had gone to Ohio. Chris and I went to Ohio last year, as noted above, and he loved it as much as I do. So we’ll see what happens this year!

Here’s our schedule as of now:

June 27-29: Malta, OH
June 29-30: Akron, OH
June 30-July 6: Bushnell, IL
July 6-7: Akron, OH
**July 7th – our 2 year anniversary!**
July 7th – return home to Fishkill, NY