Where’s Superman?

The past few days have been hard. My daughter has been teething and has been having stretches of time that are extremely difficult to handle. There are things I want to get done that aren’t getting done. There are things that HAVE to get done that I’m dreading. I had some bad dreams that woke me up at 3:30am the other day and situations that kept me from napping – so I drank a lot of caffeine – which then kept me up until about 6am the next day and then after 2 hours of sleep I had things to do and didn’t nap all day. There were stressful situations appearing and past hurts lingering in the air. I felt helpless and tired and alone in my little world. Desperate for superman to come and take charge. To make everything better. I prayed and prayed and waited for Jesus to send superman to my front door and say “let me do this for you. Go lay down for a while.” I waited for God to respond the way I thought he should. His daughter needed help so He should send someone to help her. It’s definitely the “makes sense” solution. But I quickly discovered that no one was coming to my rescue. Superman is not real. But I also realized that supermom isn’t either.

When I reached my peak, my limit, my point of “things really can’t get harder…I can’t handle this,” my husband offered to do some of the work that had to get done when he got home that evening. YES! Superman! I felt for one second. Soon followed by the overwhelming feeling that I didn’t need superman. I didn’t need physical help. I needed restoration. I needed to learn that I COULD do this. That I was called to do this. That many people do harder things. God quickly revealed the answer to my prayers. I needed to lean on HIS strength and I needed to know that these situations are stretching me and making me “able.”

I put on some soul-quenching music, specifically Charlie Hall’s “My Brightness “, “Your love is like a ROCK when I’m SPINNING around” and danced around the living room with my daughter. We smiled, we laughed, we had 3 minutes of restoration. I then realized that God gave me exactly what I needed – the knowledge that I was meant for this. I then had the most amazing (and productive) hour I’d had in days. I did all of the little things that were easy to do – no major projects – just took care of little things that were driving me nuts. I threw on some sneakers and took out the trash – breathing in the fresh air for the 2 minutes I was outside. I sorted the laundry and realized it wasn’t as much as I thought it was. I took a quick shower and loved the feeling of being clean and wearing comfy clean clothes. I did 1 game clean-up parties in each room (scroll down to learn what that is). Most importantly – I took the time to thank God for restoring my faith and confidence in the fact that He always knows best.

Sure God could provide help in the form of a friend or relative offering to help me out. And He will do that if and when it’s necessary. But as always, He knew that after the person went home, I probably wouldn’t be changed. I would just have a clean house and a (maybe) napping daughter. But He knew that I would feel this way again next week. Or next month. He saw the bigger picture.

Maybe you can’t specifically relate to this situation. Maybe you’re sitting there rolling your eyes (or just recalling the feeling from long ago) because you have more kids and more things to do and are handling it all. But maybe, just maybe, there is someone out there that needs to hear this. GOD WILL BE YOUR SUPERMAN. IT JUST MIGHT NOT BE IN THE WAY YOU THINK IT SHOULD BE. In the movies, superman was predictable. Bad situation – he swoops in and saves the day by putting out a fire or catching a falling victim. He did it in the physical. But God can do that in ways that will save you from future situations. He can prevent future fires and falls. He can give you joy that’ll last past the tragedy. And that’s a message that anyone can get something from.

*A 1 song game clean-up party. What I do is pick a room and put on music. At the beginning of a song I straighten up as many things as I can in that room, moving as quickly as I can. All items that don’t belong in that room go into a pile, sorted by which room they belong in. Trash bag in hand or a “garbage pile” works too but make sure you have one or the other. When the song is over, take everything from your piles and put them in the room they belong in. It won’t clean your house the way you dream it should be cleaned. But it’ll take away the chaos and overwhelming feeling of cleaning the rooms later on. This can also be done with dishes and throwing a load of laundry in (if you have a washer and dryer). Songs are usually between 3 and 5 minutes long so the typical person won’t even lose an hour of their day doing this. It’s productive and it’s fun – give it a try!

Organic, Gluten-Free, Dairy-Free Without Compromise

My husband has to eat gluten-free. I have to eat dairy-free. We’re quite a catch! haha. You’re probably thinking “so what DO you eat??” Well, it’s a common question and that’s why I’m writing this blog.

When you’re on a special diet it’s easy to assume that you’ll be missing out on the things you love, spending a lot of money, and having a hard time eating out. I’m here to tell you that with some careful planning and a little research this doesn’t have to be true. Here are a few of my tips:

• Go to a speciality natural food store and look for products marked “gluten-free” or “dairy-free.” Some cost a lot, some don’t. Do your research by looking at the top of shelves and bottom – not just eye level.
• Visit the organic section of your local grocery store…many stores are now carrying these products at a cheaper cost than health food stores. Some stores even have their own brands. And most grocery stores will double coupons…something you won’t find at a small natural store. My suggestions: Stop & Shop, Hannafords and now Walmart is starting to carry some.
• Learn which “normal” products are actually gluten-free/dairy-free. Fruits and vegetables, yes. Anything that you eat the skin, buy organic. Anything that you peel the skin – save a few bucks and buy the cheaper option. Chex mix has gluten-free options. Corn tortillas are naturally gluten-free, as is rice and many condiments (be careful of BBQ sauce and soy sauce though!).
• Rice milk and almond milk are great substitutes for cow’s milk. As is soy milk and all soy products (like soy yogurt and soy cheese). Tofu products are also substitutes but I’m not a fan of the taste.

That’s a bit to get you started. But let’s be honest, it’s daunting to have to choose between the many options, especially at some of the high costs. So here are some of our favorite products that we recommend:

Dairy-Free Butter: Earth Balance Buttery Spread

Affordable Baking Mix: Betty Crocker’s Gluten-Free Mixes: Brownies, Chocolate Chip Cookies, Yellow Cake Mix and Chocolate Cake Mix

Organic Cereals: Cascadian Farms cereals are my favorite.

Gluten-Free Granola: Bakery on Main

Dairy-Free Milk: Rice Dream, it’s thin like Skim Milk. I like it in coffee and in cereal

Organic Meats: Applegate. Love the bacon and hot dogs!

Pre-Packaged Gluten-Free Cookies: Glutino Chocolate and Vanilla Creme Cookies

Chips: Kettle Chips & Food Should Taste Good

Gluten-Free Flour & Pizza Crust Mix: Bob’s Red Mill

Gluten-Free Hamburger and Hot Dog Buns: Kinnikinnick Foods

If you want recommendations for anything else just leave a comment and I’ll do my best

All About My Pregnancy – in a fun way!

I found this survey and thought it would be fun to fill out. If you’ve recently had a baby, or not even that recently, feel free to reply with your answers!

1) Where were you when you first found out you were pregnant?
Officially found out at home after church on a Sunday afternoon

2) Who was with you?
Chris

3) How did you find out that you were pregnant?
Sitting at church, sick again, Lena suggested that I might be. Then Chris agreed. So after church we went to get a test and there ya go.

4) What was your first reaction to finding out you were pregnant?
Excited, nervous and scared lol

5) Your boyfriends/ Husbands/SO reaction?
He was really happy…and nervous

6) Who was the first person you told?
After Chris we told his mom. We promised her she could find out first since my parents were told first that we were getting married.

7) Did you plan to get pregnant?
Yes

Was everyone happy for you?
Of course!

9) Was anyone hating on you?
haha I don’t think so!

10) What made you decide to take a pregnancy test?
Chris saying that I might be pregnant. He was usually the one that told me he didn’t think I was pregnant when I thought I was.

11) Did you want to find out the sex?
Yea I’m too much of a planner not to know!

12) What was the sex?
Female

13) Did anyone throw you a baby shower?
Yup – my mom, mother in law and brothers girlfriends

14) What was the first thing you bought your baby?
Besides “necessities” I got her a minnie mouse baby blanket

15) Did you get anything at the baby shower that you hated? If so, what did you do with it?
haha I’m not commenting

16) Did your boyfriend/husband/SO read pregnancy books?
Yea He read the guys parts of What to Expect and any article I sent him

17) Did you loose all of the weight that you gained?
Not yet. I have about 8-10 lbs left

18) Did you get any stretch marks?
Yea I didn’t get them until the very end – so disappointing!

19) What did you crave the most?
Salad. I was a pretty boring pregnant person – nothing crazy

20) Did you crave anything crazy? If so, what?
See above

21) Who or what got on your nerves the most?
a certain co-worker who decided to tell me every time I gained weight and even pinched my thighs once!

22) Were you married at the time of conception?
Yes, just over 3 years

23) Did you have any complications during your pregnancy? If so, what?
I had high blood pressure early on but it calmed down with time

24) Where were you when you went into labor?
At home, late at night, watching Dan in Real Life on the couch

25) Did your water break or have to be broken?
The doc had to break it. Not exactly a comfortable situation.

26) Who drove you to the hospital?
Chris, at 3:04am

27) What was your due date?
July 3rd was the last estimate

28) Did you go into labor early or late in the day?
Around 12:30am

29) Who was in the room with you when you gave birth?
Chris, the nurse and my doc

30) Was it documented by photos or taped?
No way

31) Did you have any drugs for the pain?
Yea and boy did they help!

32) Did you go Natural or have a c-section?
natural

33) What was your first reaction after giving birth?
excitement, relief and then pain with the stitches!

34) How big was the baby (weight & length)?
7 lb 14 oz 19 1/2 inches

35) Did your boyfriend/ Husband/SO cry..lol?
not sure! I’m sure he got teary eyed

36) What did you name the baby (first & middle)?
Charlotte Grace

37) Did the baby have any complications? If so, what?
No she’s perfect

38) How old is the baby today?
3 1/2 months – I can’t believe it!

39) When would you like to have your next baby? If you do want another, what gender would you want?
I do want more…2 years apart would be good. I want another girl but I’d be happy with a boy too

40) Are you married now?
Yup

41) What does baby look like now?

Is Church Important?

I’m asking my readers this question today: Is church important to you?

Many people call themselves Christians. Some of those people go to church multiple times each week. Some of those people go to church every Sunday. Some of those people go to church sometimes. Some of those people don’t go to church.

Does going to church make you a Christian?

Does not going to church effect how you feel about God and how you act as a Christian?

These are all questions I’m wondering about today. How important is church to your belief in God? And if you don’t believe in God – how do you perceive church and Christians?

I know this is a completely personal and controversial topic…so I’m okay with my readers posting anonymously if they choose to do so. But I would like to hear your opinions and what you think of all of this.

Personally, I don’t think church is as important as some people make it out to be. I think it is important to belong to a church and have teachings from a Pastor and be apart of your community…but lately I think there is too much emphasis on WHERE you are being a Christian as opposed to HOW you are being a Christian. Sitting in on a good sermon and talking to your holy friends doesn’t make you a Christian in my opinion. To me, Christianity is a lifestyle. So my answer is this: I think church is important, but it’s only a small piece of what makes a person a real Christian.

What about you?

Music Tuesday: Win Free Music! Seriously!

MK837 is holding a fun contest to win 2 free songs of your choice from their label. It’s easy — all you have to do is help them name their new podcast. They’ll pick a winner next Thursday so enter now before you forget!

Not sure what they’re looking for? You’re in luck – neither are they! So be creative, have fun, and give it a try — it’d be awesome if the winner was one of my readers!

Not sure what their music sounds like? Visit their site and listen to some songs!

Money Saving Tips that Won’t Make You Cringe

I’ve always been one for getting a good deal (it’s that Jewish part of me!). When I was younger I proudly came home with a  pair of blue sneakers that I bought new for 33 cents. I’ll never forget the looks on my dad and grandpa’s faces…I had topped any deal they’d ever gotten!

Well with now being a 1 income household, saving money and finding bargains isn’t a hobby anymore, it’s a necessity. But I refuse to compromise my happiness, so it’s requiring a strategy! Here is a list of things I’ve discovered. I hope you get something out of this and add to my list by commenting below. The guideline I live by is this: why pay more when I can pay less for the same thing?

1. Before purchasing ANYTHING, I ask myself: Will this benefit myself or my family? Will I get pure satisfaction from this purchase or will I regret it later? Will this purchase matter tomorrow or am I just giving in to my current “want.” This will help you make less emotional purchases (ie: frequent stops at starbucks/dunkin donuts, snack at a gas station, a shirt that’s on sale, another belt or hat, a new purse when the ones you have are fine, lunch out when there is food at home etc.)

2. Buy a water bottle that you love. I found that once I purchased a reusable, BPA free water bottle that suited all of my drinking needs, I was more likely to use it. I bought a $9.99 one at Target that has a pop off top that I can open with one hand and it’s slim enough to fit on the side of my diaper bag. It’s also easy to clean and holds a good amount of water. Now whenever I leave the house I bring a water bottle filled with fresh filtered water with me. It’s perfect for drinking in the car, at the mall, in church, food shopping etc. and *bonus* can be refilled for free anywhere that has a water fountain. This helps me to not purchase a drink because I’m out and thirsty. Get bored of this idea quickly? I mix it up by sometimes throwing in ice cubes and giving it a cold, fresh taste or fill it up with iced tea, juice or anything else I have in the house! Buy large bottles of soda/juice and fill up a water bottle – it’s much cheaper than buying cans and juice packs – plus you’re helping the environment.

3. Make your own beverages. Got some hot tea at home? Make your own pitcher of iced tea! It’s super easy and the instructions are usually right on the box. You can make your own flavors and sweeten it as you prefer. Not only is this free (since you have everything you need at home: tea, water and sugar) but it’s much better for you. Especially if it’s green tea!

4. Buy large and make small. You pay for convenience and packaging. Instead of snack packs and travel sized grocery items – buy the bigger bags/bottles and use ziplock bags to make your own portable snacks. It’s super easy to throw some pretzels in a bag and will be much cheaper than buying them that way. Too much work? Buy the portable snacks if it’ll keep you from purchasing food while you’re out. And, it’s much healthier for you, usually.

5. Coupons are your friend. Uncool? Maybe. But saving $8 off your grocery bill because you printed and cut a piece of paper seems worth it to me. I follow a few coupon blogs and save the posts that I’ll use. It’s much easier than finding the coupons yourself – these women are great at keeping up with the deals so you don’t have to! To do some looking on your own, visit: afullcup.com, coupons.com, smartsource.com, redplum.com and allyou.com. Also visit the websites of the brands you like as many post coupons (ie: Stonyfield Farms, Newmans Own).

6. Learn how to shop at CVS, Walgreens & Rite Aid. I usually only shop at CVS but a lot of people have luck at the other stores also. Once you sign up for their free extracare program you’ll receive coupons and special offers. You’ll receive cash back from purchasing certain items and learn about special deals. Also, CVS takes coupons so using them with sales and cash back offers you can really save some money. I’m not the best at explaining it but do a google search on shopping at CVS and you’ll find a few people who break it down real easy.

7. Buy what you need, not what’s on sale. I’ve learned that even if something is on sale, if it wasn’t something I needed – I still wasted money. This of course is different than stocking up on something you use a lot because it’s on sale. First thing, bad, Second thing, good.

8. Be careful of store credit cards and email updates. It sounds harmless. It even sounds beneficial. But I found that the more emails I got telling me about special deals and offering me coupons, the more I felt the need to shop. Unless they’re offering me something free, it’s best for me to only go shopping when I need to go shopping. So instead of the updates, I just do some research. Visit retailmenot.com and look up what deals are going on at your favorite stores. You’ll be able to get coupon codes and printable coupons just as easy usually.

9. Ordering online can be a real great idea, if you know how to work the online magic. Sign up for ebates.com and receive cash back just for shopping online. Visit retailmenot and get some coupon codes. Try everything! Sometimes you’ll be able to use more than 1 coupon code, offering you a great deal. And be careful of shipping costs. A lot of sites will offer free shipping if you spend a certain amount. Only do this if you can stock up on items you need. Don’t “find something” just to make the cut off. Chances are it’s still cheaper to pay the shipping cost.

10. Do your research! Google shopping is an easy way to find out which store has what you’re looking for the cheapest.

11. Don’t eat out – instead, learn to enjoy eating in. It’s expensive to eat out and you usually don’t get a second meal out of it. But eating in usually requires cooking, cleaning and preparation. What I’m doing is making cooking an enjoyable part of the day rather than something I have to do. I bought a cute apron that I enjoy wearing and found a few new recipes I thought would taste yummy. I pour myself a drink, put on some music and find the joy in cooking. I try to find recipes that will produce leftovers so that we have lunch for the next day. For the days there aren’t leftovers, I make sure we have a few “emergency lunches” on hand so that we don’t purchase lunch often. Canned soup, bread, peanut butter, frozen waffles, cereal and oatmeal are often on hand for Chris who eats at work. For me eating at home, I could always make eggs or a baked potato…usually even a hot dog Eating out might be fun but it’s costly and you don’t always know how good the ingredients are so it’s safer to make your own food.

12. Make coffee at home. We buy organic coffee from Sam’s Club and save an insane amount of money by filling up our travel mugs when we’re out on a weekend or heading to work in the morning. Feel like you’re missing out? We’re learning to add spices to our coffee to make the usual brew not so boring. So now when we head over to Starbucks, we truly enjoy our 400 calorie $4 beverages

13. Consignment shops and 2nd hand stores. I always thought Goodwill and Salvation Army when this topic came up.. And personally, I’ve had no luck there over the years. Little did I know there a lot of consignment shops in our area (2 right on main street in beacon, 1 in hopewell, 2 in fishkill) and these stores carry clothes of a higher quality. Got kids? Shop 2nd hand! There is a line of stores called Once Upon a Child that really has some amazing things for cheap prices. Really want something new? Go for it, just try and use a coupon I believe nothing good comes from never treating yourself. You just can’t do it all of the time.

I know there are some more things I’m missing but I’ll leave you with a few words instead: crock pot, coupons, research, passing on, clothes swapping, bulk bins, reusable bags, no waste, baking, creative cooking, less is more, creativity, Netflix, Redbox, single song downloads, Amazon free mp3 downloads, warehouse stores, free trials, do it yourself projects, hand wash and lastly the phrase “do I really need it?”

Please comment below with your money saving solutions! Good luck and have fun

Labor Day Rest

From the Proverbs 31 Ministries Devotional written by Rachel Olsen. Enjoy.

“And God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done.” Genesis 2:3 (NIV)

In 1882 U.S. cabinet maker Peter McGuire introduced his idea for a new holiday saying, “Let us have a festive day during which a parade through the streets of the city would permit public tribute to American Industry.” A dozen years later President Cleveland signed a bill into law designating the first Monday in September “Labor Day.” For many Americans today is a day off from work, a chance to cook-out and hang-out in the lingering warm weather of summer.

A day off from labor, however, was not a new concept when McGuire suggested his holiday. The concept of a day of rest was first declared by the Lord in Genes is. In illustration, God rested the seventh day after creating the world and He deemed the day of rest holy (Gen. 2:2-3). He didn’t call it Labor Day – He called it the Sabbath.

Sabbath is a not a day of tribute to workers, it’s a day of tribute to their Maker. It’s a day to rest your body while renewing your mind by making the focus of the day your Maker and your relationship with Him. In the Jewish tradition, the Sabbath is the focal point of the week – not just a day of laundry or list-making to gear back up for the week ahead. The Jewish people spent three days preparing for Sabbath, and three days reflecting on what they had learned or encountered of God during the Sabbath. They were a Sabbath-focused people, and therefore a God-focused people.

Keri Wyatt Kent, author of Breathe, writes, “This creates a rhythm of life that puts our focus not on our stuff or our schedule but on the opportunity to meet with God.” Kent reveals:

“We are created in the image of God, and he modeled for us a way of life that makes sense for how we are created. Here’s how to dance the dance of life, he said: work, be creative, use your imagination, throw yourself into it, whether you are washing dishes, reading to your kids and running a household, or trading stocks, reading corporate reports, and running a business. …At the end of each day, stop. Take a rest, eat a good meal, get enough sleep, and refresh yourself. Take time to think about your day, to notice where God was in it and where you were blessed, and to say, “It’s good.” Then go back at it the next day. And after six days, take a whole day off. And say, “It’s really good.” Spend a whole day just pausing, just reflecting on how really good it is, and then start the dance again, at a sustainable pace.”

That sounds really good to me. Whether you are here with me in the United States today, or someplace else on God’s green earth, may this Labor Day mark the day that you and I decide to rest and become God-focused people.

Dear Lord, I want to rest in You. Show me how to live this way. Meet me there in my time of contemplation, reflection, and worship. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

It’s Not There…Nor There..

As a Christian I’ve learned that the way to get answers or fix a bad mood or even just to find a little lift to a normal day, is by connecting with God. I’ve also learned that there are many ways to connect with God. Not just the traditional read the bible, pray, fast and fellowship ways…but by reading Christian blogs, meditating on devotionals, worshipping to music, staring at the sky and reading a well written Christian novel. I know from experience that I “get something” from all of the above, but it’s more fun/entertaining/interesting to choose from the second list as opposed to the first.

But what happens when you choose from the 2nd list 90% of the time? I’ve found that you end up living a bit too spiritually. It becomes very easy to come up with your own theories, meditate on certain scriptures and ignore others that are also important, become judgemental of others (specifically traditional Christians) and worst of all, you end up having a 2nd hand relationship with God and cheat yourself of the connection your soul desires.

Lately I find myself in this boat. I’m praying and reading blogs, waiting for that divine revelation. I’m praying and listening to music, waiting for that one line to bring me to tears. I’m praying and going for a walk, waiting to hear God’s voice. And sometimes it really happens that way. But I’m finding more often than not, God impressing on my heart “you won’t find it there…nor there. It’s in my word.”

Why is it so much harder to sit down and read my bible than to do any of those other things? I know the answer, yet honestly, it doesn’t often change my actions for long. I know God’s truth is within his word. I know words spoken that pertain to today are sitting in there for me to read first hand. I know learning and hearing about God are done through other people’s interpretations when you don’t go directly to the source yourself. But still, day after day, I find it hard to sit down and open my bible. But I know that when I do, oh man, I regret every other time I didn’t. I just wish that feeling would last. But no, the struggle continues.

Anyone else with me on this? I know there has to be someone out there that isn’t the perfect Christian we want everyone to think we are. Well whether you admit it or not, I just want you to know that you’re not alone. There is no perfect person and no perfect Christian. This is my weakness – admit to yourself, what’s yours?

 “As for God, His way is perfect; The word of the LORD is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in Him.” – 2 Samuel 22:31

Making the Hard Decision

There are times in life that we know what we’re supposed to do; whether it’s something a teacher tells us to do, a parent encourages us to pursue or a feeling coming from within. Those decisions are easy decisions. We know we’re supposed to do something and then we have to choose between 2 options: doing it or not doing it. Clear cut, black and white, yes or no, there is a correct answer. Listen or don’t listen.

But then sometimes in life we have to make hard decisions. Decisions where there is no right or wrong. Where we have to make a choice without having proof that it’s the right thing to do. There is no crystal ball saying go down this path and God hasn’t shut all other doors making this choice the only option. It’s a hard decision that no one else can make for you – you just have to make it and see how things play out based on that decision. It’s the scariest choices in life but in the end, the most rewarding. These choices help challenge our beliefs and make us weigh our priorities. They make us grow as individuals and help us become a better version of who we are today.

I had to make a hard decision recently. I had to decide what I wanted to do once my maternity leave ended. For months I’ve been fantasizing about being a stay at home mom. To spend the day raising my daughter the way I see fit and not missing a precious moment of her life. About not being controlled by “the man” and working a desk job. But these were all fantasies. They were “Jess daydreams.” I wasn’t the type of person to just quit her career to stay home and be…a housewife. “Just” a mother. The person who cooks, cleans, does laundry, changes diapers and joins a mommy and me group. I worked my butt off in high school. I went to a great, but very hard college and graduated with a good degree. I worked not 1, but 2 non-paid internships to advance my resume in the pile of entry-level applicants. I worked summer jobs and temporary positions. I finally landed a good position in a company that pays for me to travel and stay in fancy hotels. I worked my way up and have favor among the decision makers in the company. I get bonuses and raises. I’m somebody in the career world and I worked hard to get there.

But then the tears formed. Day after day, night after night. Mostly in secrecy as I was confused by these feelings. I was supposed to go back to work and help provide for my family. To do my part. We got Charlotte into the daycare of our choice and I was able to have a fully paid 3 month maternity leave. It was all set. The plan was in motion. But still, the tears came more and more each day. Until finally I broke down and had to admit that it wasn’t emotions anymore. There was something inside of me screaming that my priorities in life had changed and it was time to make a decision. The hard decision to be a stay at home mom. That I would still be “doing my part” for my family, it just wouldn’t be in a financial way. Instead of rushing off to day care I would be making my husband’s coffee in the morning and seeing him out the door. Instead of chatting with coworkers over coffee I will be sipping my coffee as I wake my daughter up for her first feeding of the day. Instead of attending morning meetings I will be strategically planning my day. Instead of doing lunch with co-workers or reading a book I will be tickling my daughter and watching her smile and make noises that she hasn’t made before. Instead of returning calls to international companies I will be making doctors appointments and running errands. Instead of sitting in traffic trying to get home I will be making dinner so my husband can have something to look forward to while sitting in traffic. And instead of trying to get a million things done in my non-work time AND spend time with my family, I will enjoy the overwhelming peace that comes along with our new, tight budget.

So goodbye Outback Steakhouse take-out, goodbye coffee & lattes every weekend while shopping, goodbye buying things whenever I want and goodbye fancy restaurants & parties in the city. Instead, I choose my family. I choose the smiles and laughter. I choose the peace and home-cooking. I choose the budget. I choose the careful spending. I choose being “just a mom” and realize that it’s not that at all. It’s the right decision for me.

*Disclaimer: I’m in no way putting down or judging any mother that has to or chooses to work. I think it’s one of the hardest things a woman can do. It’s just not the right decision for me right now.

Jess’ Guide to Month 9, Labor & the Hospital

A few months ago I wrote a post about what I learned being pregnant. It was a big hit so I’ve decided to do a follow up post about the rest of my pregnancy lessons. Missed the first post? Check it out here.

Pre-Labor

• Keep reminding yourself that the baby WILL come out. You will not be pregnant forever…even if baby is late.
• As hard as it will be, DO NOT count down until your “due date.” Baby is going to come when baby wants to come.
• Have fun setting up the baby room/nursery but don’t go too crazy. Once I arrived home with Charlotte I realized that the drawers I put everything in made NO sense. Chances are, you’re going to move everything once you develop your own system.
• You will probably get A LOT of newborn clothes. DO NOT wash everything. We have a pile of clothes that she already outgrew and never got to wear. Remember, those cute onesies CANNOT be worn until the umbilical cord falls off. Charlotte’s took over 2 weeks, so she outgrew a lot of clothes before being able to wear them.
• SwaddleMe Sleepsacks have been lifesavers for us. She falls right asleep when wearing one (usually).
• Get a washable/waterproof/vinyl changing pad. DO NOT get the pretty non-waterproof/non-vinyl covers. One little drop of pee and you have to put it in the wash.
• Got a lot of duplicate “baby items” from your shower but don’t have receipts? You have a few options. Go online and add them to your registry (check babiesrus before other stores – their prices are higher so you’ll get more for the return!). Then you can return it to the store without a receipt. Can’t find it on the registry? Go to target or walmart. Both stores will let you return items without receipts. Target gives store credit, walmart gives cash back up to $20 I believe and then store credit after that. We ended up returning a lot of items, keeping 1 of each, and decided to buy more as needed. So far, it hasn’t been needed and we got $30 to Target just from powders, cremes and lotions!
• Buy diapers now. In your first few weeks you won’t want to run out and buy diapers. I loved the Huggies Pure & Natural for newborns because it has a special dip in the front so you don’t cover the umbilical cord. Nothing more challenging than folding down a diaper correctly at 3am.
• Keep walking/exercising. It’ll keep your mind clear and baby moving. It’s the best way to help baby along.
• Enjoy some last date nights (if it’s your first child). Chances are you’re not going to want to use a babysitter in the first few months so this may be your last real date for a while. Chris and I had 3 last dates and all were worth it.
• If people offer you baby clothes/items, take them and wash immediately. You won’t know what baby likes and what you like until he/she is already here and getting to a store isn’t as easy.
• RELAX and enjoy the last weeks of pregnancy. It’s hard to do. And you’re tired and usually in some kind of discomfort but remember, it’s the last time your name won’t be mom for the rest of your life
• Buy books, movies, tv show boxsets etc. While waiting for baby and as a new mom you’ll be up many hours for different reasons.
• Braxton hicks contractions are different than real ones. But if you’re anything like me – you won’t be able to tell the difference.
• Got an iphone or app-friendly phone device? Get the contraction tracker app! It’s free and a real easy way to track how long and frequent your contractions are. It’s how I knew it was time to take a trip to the hospital.
• There is a long list of signs you might be going into labor in many books. Use them as a reference. I didn’t get some of the signs ever and honestly, many of them came just a few hours before I went into labor. Don’t get discouraged…everyone is different.
• Pack your bag for the hospital! Here’s my suggestions that might not be too obvious: hair brush and tie, mascara/light makeup, bath robe & slippers, disposable razor, toothbrush & tooth paste, cheap but cute nursing pajamas (or you can wear the robes they give you- i did both), lotion/stretch creme, deodorant, chapstick, comfy go home clothes (maternity clothes still), cell phone charger, camera.
• Go food shopping/make and freeze food. You will NOT be up for cooking and hubbie won’t be either. We lived off of pre-made chili for many days.
• Sanitize/sterilize bottles, pacifiers etc. before baby comes. I didn’t think to and didn’t realize it should definitely be done before using them. Put bathing things together in a basket and organize clothes so newborn outfits are easy to grab and 6 months clothes are out of reach.

Labor/Hospital

• Not sure if you should go to the hospital yet or if contractions are real? Call your doctor. I was afraid of bothering him with stupid questions and false labor but they get calls all of the time and are the only ones that know what you should do. Don’t be afraid to look stupid.
• I was told that if you’re just saying “ow” then you’re not going into labor. This may be true for some, but do you know how high your pain tolerance is? I obviously didn’t. I was saying “ow” when I was already hours into labor. Use your own judgement.
• Not sure if it’s a real contraction? Try moving (if you’re sitting, stand up etc.). If it gets worse/stays the same, it’s probably real.
• Communicate with your husband/ride to the hospital. If you don’t need to do a movie-like panic run th the car speeding to the hospital scene, don’t do it. There will be enough going on. Stay calm, breathe, and remember, he’s probably as nervous as you are.
• Be honest with your nurses. If you’re in pain, tell them. If you feel pain coming on but think you can handle it a bit longer, tell them NOW. Hospitals get busy out of no where and you don’t want to be stuck waiting for pain medicine when you really need it.
• Stay positive, stay light hearted, and remember, it’s just one (usually) really long day. It WILL end and your baby WILL come out one way or another.
• If your hospital room has a TV in it, put something fun and light on. We watched 90s tv sitcoms during labor, during pushing and for days in recovery. It’s nice to have something to look at but not really feel the need to WATCH it. Home Improvement was on when Charlotte was born. Who knew I’d be looking at Tim Allen while pushing my first child out. haha.
• “Now is not the time to be a super hero” – Dr. Rudnicki. Take the pain medicine unless you’re really against it.
• It will hurt. But you will have a little baby in your arms when it’s all over.

Hospital Stay

• A lot of people will want to visit. You may want to limit it. You and husband and baby will be very tired and worn out…remind people they can visit you when you get home. And keep your nurse in the loop, she’s usually willing to kick people out of the room so you don’t have to be the bad guy.
• Not sure if you want to have baby sleep at night in the room with you or in the nursery? I suggest the nursery. You’re going to be exhausted and glued to your bed in recovery. Let the nurses soothe his/her crying and change diapers for a few nights. You’ll have MANY chances to do it yourself later on. Plus, if there are any complications – they know what to do and you don’t. Charlotte had one night of choking on mucus she was coughing up. I would have freaked out if I was alone with her when it happened.
• Planning on nursing? The nurses will bring baby to you in the middle of the night so that you can. Just make sure they know this is what you want – if not, they’ll give him/her formula from a bottle.
• Questions? ASK NOW! Nurses and doctors are all around you. Don’t be embarassed. It’s harder to call later on.
• Anything in the hospital room WILL get thrown out so take it home with you! From the disposable post-pregnancy underwear to the huge maxi pads to the baby’s hair brush.
• Witchhazel pads/Tucks and ice packs feel amazing for your sore area. Make sure to bring them home with you AND buy some more when needed.
• Take a shower, brush your hair, put on a little makeup…it’ll help you to feel so much better. Especially if you’re going to have visitors who want to take pictures..and they will.
• Speaking of pictures, call the shots. I told everyone I did not want my “just had a baby” pictures posted anywhere and they respected that. Take some so you have them, but the world doesn’t need to see you in a gown with crazy hair and a fat, tired face unless you want them to.
• Heard that you leave the hospital looking 6 months pregnant? Unfortunately it’s true. It takes days/weeks to not look pregnant anymore. And then, you still have a mushy belly. But remember, you did JUST have a baby.
• Take some of the hospital time to relax with just your family. The nurses take care of you and bring you food and pain meds. Your hubbie will want some quiet time and your baby may not want to be passed around all day long. Your first days home will be tiring and overwhelming, take advantage of the hospital help.

So that’s all I can think of. I’m sure there are more things but I think that’s enough. I will leave you with one funny story. Our first night (or 2nd) back at home, I had to wake up to feed Charlotte. So I set the alarm and somehow opened my eyes after only a few hours of sleep. But I woke up confused and panicked. I woke up Chris because I couldn’t figure out how to sit the bed up to feed her. I was hitting the side of the mattress looking for the controls. It took me a few minutes to realize that I wasn’t in the hospital and my mattress did not have controls. It was a really funny moment that I’ll never forget.

New Music Tuesday:Andrew Peterson

As a brand new mom I’m constantly searching for ways to soothe my crying baby. As a lover of music, I’m determined to find that perfect tune that will put a smile on my little girl’s face. I tried the baby tunes and the classical music as many people recommend but have had no luck. So what does she like? She likes Shawn McDonald and Brave Saint Saturn…and Andrew Peterson.

Andrew Peterson is a Christian, acoustic-guitar playing, singer/songwriter from Nashville who is releasing his new album “Counting Stars” today through Centricity Music. This album can best be described by the words: inspired, peaceful, poetic, pensive. Honestly, listening to this album I can feel the artists influences and surroundings: beautiful landscapes, love, God, relationships and the stories that come from these simple yet complicated aspects of life.

These songs, or stories as it seems, are put to beautiful melodies and  are complimented by Andrew’s peaceful voice. Each song gives us a look into the personal life, memories and soul of this experienced artist; and to me, it’s what puts this album above most other singer/songwriters releasing music these days. It’s not about selling records or trying to invoke emotions from the listener – it’s about the heart of the artist and his art.

Check out Andrew Peterson and his album “Counting Stars” to hear the music that soothed the soul of my fussy baby and brought a peaceful, beautiful atmosphere into my home.

Hiatus: over.

Wonder where I’ve been? Well do a search on my blog for “pregnant” and you’ll notice that the posts have stopped June 28, 2010 at 1:20pm little miss Charlotte Grace arrived. I had  a 10 hour labor which I hear is very good for your first child. And since I do have male readers and those not interested in all things girly, I won’t be blogging on my child birth experience. I do, however, love telling people about it – so if you want to know the full play by play or a summary or answers to a few questions – feel free to contact me via email or commenting below and I’l gladly share I will say that it’s an experience I will always cherish because I’m so in love with this little person sitting right in front of me. However, i’m not entirely looking forward to doing the whole labor thing again one day. So I have some fun and exciting things coming up on my blog but until then, here are some pictures of my little girl. From day 1 to day 21:

Charlotte - 1 day old

Funny Friday Dance Video!

Enjoy today’s video! It’s a funny one And yes, I used to do this dance!

The Other Type of Faith

Through my spiritual journey I’m discovering that there are all different types of faith. Some I’ve gotten pretty good at and others I’m discovering are a weakness. Right now in my life there seems to be 2 different types of faith. The first type of faith is what I call blind faith. It’s that take a jump, not sure what I’m doing type of faith. It’s when you pray that God works a miracle. It’s when you quit a job based on “knowing” there is a better one out there without actually HAVING the job. It’s deciding to have a baby and trust that God will work out the details. It’s saying yes to a task that you aren’t confident you can do. For me, it’s become the easy kind of faith. I know there is a God and I know that he speaks to me daily…so I KNOW that if he put something on my heart, he’ll come through with the answers I need.

But it seems that there is another type of faith active in my life that I’m NOT so confident in. It’s the faith that says “okay, I know that I can take this into my own hands, but maybe that’s not the best idea.” It’s having an answer in your head but then wondering if it’s the BEST answer. It’s the kind of faith that determines how bumpy your path is as opposed to if it’s the right path. It’s putting aside what you think is best and asking God what IS best. And I’m finding that this is a really hard thing to do. I’m underdeveloped in this area but I know God is starting to say “come on Jess, you need to work on this”…and so I am.

So it seems that I have no problem moving across the country with no money but I do have a problem choosing when to say no to something when I want to say yes. Does anyone else have faith issues? I’d love to hear!

Funny Friday Dance Video!

This video comes through our friend Dave. I find it entertaining yet scary that this baby can move like this – good luck to his future in “dancing!” Enjoy & Happy Friday ya’ll!