I’m sure by now you’ve heard that some people believe the rapture will happen on Saturday May 21st and the world will end October 21st, 2011.

I personally do not believe this will happen. I’m not going to go into why and I’m not looking for any debates. This isn’t what my surprise post is about. It’s about the wonderful quote “If you don’t believe in (or stand for) something, you’ll fall for anything.”

At this point I’m just asking you, do you know what you believe? You DO or you DON’T. And it’s important to realize that everyone is entitled to this…but it doesn’t make either of you right.

Some people believe the world will end in 2011.

Some people believe the world will end in 2012.

Some people believe that no one knows when the world will end.

Some people believe in God.

Some people don’t.

Some people believe in more than one God.

Some people believe that chocolate is the best ice cream flavor.

Some people believe that vanilla is.

Get my point?

Know what you believe in and stand for it. Don’t let someone else’s belief sway you if you don’t feel they’re right. Don’t say things you don’t mean and don’t do things you don’t think you should do.

It’s an easy concept but it’s a hard action. I just wanted to take a few minutes to encourage you. Believe in something. You have as much right as anyone else does.

That being said…was the easier part.

This part is a bit harder.

I’ve been blogging for a long time. I’ve actually developed some following. It amazes me. Thanks so much for reading what I have to say!

But the truth is, I don’t have much to say right now. God is doing such a quiet, humbling work in my life and I’m currently on a journey that isn’t meant for the public eye. He’s doing things in my heart that can’t be put into words. He’s opening my eyes to things that are meant for me alone to see. He’s opening doors that are marked with a sign “for members only” and the membership price is extremely high and the applications accepted are few.

So what am I trying to say? I’m saying that it’s official. As of right now, this blog is closed. Alive for people to read old posts but for the near future, no new posts will be written and published.

It’s been a fun and amazing journey but it’s just not what I’m supposed to be doing right now with my time. I’m sad and excited but I know that with God – what will be, will be. And things may change..but for now, my online blogging life door has been closed and I’m smiling at the other doors that are opening because of it.

Thanks for all of the love and support and comments and reading! You can still keep up with me on facebook and twitter and gmail and in person and all those other ways if you’re interested. And if not, that’s okay too. I’m believing that God has a plan much bigger than I could ever know.

With love,

Jess/Proverb31girl

I’m not prophetic in a way that I can tell you “thus says the Lord” or even in the “let me tell you what God is saying” way. But I do know how to pray, speak to God and hear His voice in my life. And in my life, he made it clear from the very beginning, 2010 was about change in my life. Just read my past blogs and you’ll see that trend. In 2010 I had a baby, moved, got plugged in at a new church, left my career to be a stay at home mom, lost friends, made friends, got back in touch with some old friends and overall, had a lot of smaller adjustments happen as well – including eating dairy-free. Looking back, it seems like it was a long year. I think change can do that. Not many people like change and therefore it was a stressful year but also a year that is ending with a full-cart shopping list of blessings.

In 2010 I was also (forced) to learn a lot about myself and a lot of my strengths and weaknesses. I’ve learned about what true hurt looks like but I’ve also learned what true forgiveness is. I’ve grown as a woman and a wife more than any other year. I’m quickly learning what true sacrifice is and how to put my own agenda behind me for the good of the future and for others. I’ve learned how easy it is to get prideful in being “a good Christian.” I’ve also learned that being a good Christian doesn’t always look the way we think it should. That many people around us, Christians or not, are parading around in masks and disguises that they don’t know they own and in fact, those disguses are owning them. I’ve also learned that there are some amazing people out there who are waiting for you to come into their life if you’ll only say hi (even if it’s just in a bathroom! )

2010 brought about such change and stretching (somewhat literally!) for me that I was afraid of what 2011 would bring. But honestly, I think I already know. December 2010 has been a very insightful month for me. I’ve taken the time to look at a lot of things in my life and prayed about some things just kinda sitting around in my life, seemingly collecting dust. The things that weigh us down because they’re not growing or shrinking…they’re just there – not getting addressed. For me, early 2011 is about addressing those things. It’s about clearing out the corners now that the change has taken place. It’s about letting go of things I “just couldn’t deal with” in 2010, so I didn’t. It’s about really pressing in to the things I feel called to be doing and ending/putting away the things I know aren’t active in my life for a reason. It’s about building on the changes that were made in 2010 and not looking back wondering what if. It’s about moving forward with my new life and new friendships and new ventures and investments. It’s about choosing to stay focused on a few things rather than wrangling in and holding on to as much as I can grab. It’s about trusting God with what He’s given me and what He’s taken away…knowing that this may still change and alter and I have to be okay with that immediately…not months down the road after it’s beat me up a bit. It’s going to be about making decisions and then moving forward rather than closing my eyes and jumping. It’s going to be a year of being aware of what’s going on around me and focusing on the path I know I’m supposed to be on. It’s about the mature knowledge that some things have to be let go of, all emotions aside. And from what I can see, it’s going to be a year of keeping Jesus as my center and learning to kick the little buggers chewing on my ankles aside while still moving forward with a smile on my face and a joy in my heart.

You might be completely confused, frustrated and bewildered by what all of these things are. Please don’t be. This isn’t a blog where you should respond with “are we still going to be friends?” “what does she mean by that?” “how does she know that” “what happened?” etc. To be honest, I don’t even know if I’d have an answer for you. I just know the truths that are on my heart, and most of them do not have specific situations or people connected to them; they’re as vague and general as this post is.

All I can say is that I welcome 2011 with open arms and encourage you to do the same. Don’t bring the hurts of 2010 into 2011 but don’t ignore them either. Deal with them, let them go, and move forward into a new year filled with possibilities.

*Happy New Year! Thanks for all of the love and support. I look forward to hearing about what God has in store for YOUR new year.

Dear Size 3 Jeans and XS/S shirts,

I’m sure you’ve seen this coming…we haven’t seen each other in months. We’ve both been very busy – you know, with me getting pregnant and having a baby and you…well you never changing. You’re the same as you’ve always been and you just don’t fit into my life anymore. We had some great times and I really appreciate everything you did for me. I just wish I appreciated you more  than I did now that I look back. I’ll never forget the feeling of leaving my 5/6 jeans behind; the day I discovered my insane lack of eating diet and over gym attendance would bring me to you. Ah that feeling of seeing that little label read SIZE 3, even though no one else ever knew or could tell a difference. I knew in my heart that you were always better than the other jeans…even if you cost the same amount and looked exactly the same. And you, oh my precious XS and S baby-tees…you kept my wardrobe looking like I was a little 14 year old girl all throughout college. For that, I thank you. Really. There is nothing like looking back at my 21st birthday and realizing that you were worth having in my life. You brought me the confidence to get wasted and dance on chairs, not caring what I was like on the inside…just how sexy I was on the outside. I just wish I knew back then how much you controlled my life.

But as I said, things are different now. I see you sitting in bags collecting dust, you and your out of style cuts and designs. And I see me, in my new, yet larger, clothes, enjoying life as a mom and wife. I’ve moved on. My new clothes and I don’t have the connection that you and I once had…but I think that’s for the best. Because a day will come that I will probably change sizes again and when that time comes, it won’t be so hard to say goodbye. I’ll end that relationship with a testimony that won’t be aimed towards young girls and the dangers of “label control” and vanity.

So this is goodbye. Thanks for the memories that will keep my life in perspective forever more. I just hope my readers never have to have a breakup like this. It’s painful to realize how controlling you were. How manipulative. How deceitful. So many promises that were broken and unrealistic ideas. Such vanity. And for what? The label goes on the inside of my clothes. And unless a day comes that the label is in large letters on the front of everything I wear, I’m determined to not let a number or letter control my life the way you did.

Sincerely,

(a much happier) Jess

I’m usually not one for advertising sites but I was seriously amazed at how easy, fun and simple Shutterfly was. Make sure to take a look at their cards and calendars too. I’ve been “collecting” discount codes to their site and am able to get discounts on products, free shipping after purchasing a certain amount and even some more free photo books. It’s definitely worth the effort and an easy way to get some presents checked off of my list. I’m thinking Grandparents who aren’t hip on the digital and still request pictures in the mail of their new great granddaughter! 

Have mercy on me, O God,

according to your unfailing love;

according to your great compassion blot out my transgressions.

Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin.

For I know my transgressions,

and my sin is always before me.

Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight,

so that you are provide right when you speak and justified when you judge.

Surely I was sinful at birth,

sinful from the time my mother conceived me.

Surely you desire truth in the inner parts;

you teach me wisdom in the inmost place.

Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean;

wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.

Let me hear joy and gladness;

let the bones you have crushed rejoice.

Hide your face from my sins and blot out all my iniquity.

Create in me a pure heart, O God,

and renew a steadfast spirit within me.

Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me.

Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.

Then I will teach transgressors your ways,

and sinners will turn back to you.

Save me from bloodguilt, O God,

the God who saves me,

and my tongue will sing of your righteousness.

O Lord, open my lips,

and my mouth will declare your praise.

You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;

you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;

a broken and contrite heart,

O God, you will not despise.

In your good pleasure make Zion prosper;

build up the walls of Jerusalem.

Then there will be righteous sacrifices,

whole burnt offerings to delight you;

then bulls will be offered on your altar.

~ Psalm 51

When I reached my peak, my limit, my point of “things really can’t get harder…I can’t handle this,” my husband offered to do some of the work that had to get done when he got home that evening. YES! Superman! I felt for one second. Soon followed by the overwhelming feeling that I didn’t need superman. I didn’t need physical help. I needed restoration. I needed to learn that I COULD do this. That I was called to do this. That many people do harder things. God quickly revealed the answer to my prayers. I needed to lean on HIS strength and I needed to know that these situations are stretching me and making me “able.”

I put on some soul-quenching music, specifically Charlie Hall’s “My Brightness “, “Your love is like a ROCK when I’m SPINNING around” and danced around the living room with my daughter. We smiled, we laughed, we had 3 minutes of restoration. I then realized that God gave me exactly what I needed – the knowledge that I was meant for this. I then had the most amazing (and productive) hour I’d had in days. I did all of the little things that were easy to do – no major projects – just took care of little things that were driving me nuts. I threw on some sneakers and took out the trash – breathing in the fresh air for the 2 minutes I was outside. I sorted the laundry and realized it wasn’t as much as I thought it was. I took a quick shower and loved the feeling of being clean and wearing comfy clean clothes. I did 1 game clean-up parties in each room (scroll down to learn what that is). Most importantly – I took the time to thank God for restoring my faith and confidence in the fact that He always knows best.

Sure God could provide help in the form of a friend or relative offering to help me out. And He will do that if and when it’s necessary. But as always, He knew that after the person went home, I probably wouldn’t be changed. I would just have a clean house and a (maybe) napping daughter. But He knew that I would feel this way again next week. Or next month. He saw the bigger picture.

Maybe you can’t specifically relate to this situation. Maybe you’re sitting there rolling your eyes (or just recalling the feeling from long ago) because you have more kids and more things to do and are handling it all. But maybe, just maybe, there is someone out there that needs to hear this. GOD WILL BE YOUR SUPERMAN. IT JUST MIGHT NOT BE IN THE WAY YOU THINK IT SHOULD BE. In the movies, superman was predictable. Bad situation – he swoops in and saves the day by putting out a fire or catching a falling victim. He did it in the physical. But God can do that in ways that will save you from future situations. He can prevent future fires and falls. He can give you joy that’ll last past the tragedy. And that’s a message that anyone can get something from.

*A 1 song game clean-up party. What I do is pick a room and put on music. At the beginning of a song I straighten up as many things as I can in that room, moving as quickly as I can. All items that don’t belong in that room go into a pile, sorted by which room they belong in. Trash bag in hand or a “garbage pile” works too but make sure you have one or the other. When the song is over, take everything from your piles and put them in the room they belong in. It won’t clean your house the way you dream it should be cleaned. But it’ll take away the chaos and overwhelming feeling of cleaning the rooms later on. This can also be done with dishes and throwing a load of laundry in (if you have a washer and dryer). Songs are usually between 3 and 5 minutes long so the typical person won’t even lose an hour of their day doing this. It’s productive and it’s fun – give it a try!

The ads.

“Clearance” “Sale” “One Day Only” etc etc.

There’s a phrase that goes “if it looks too good to be true, it probably is.” Well at this point in the year I advise you to forget this saying and bring it back in mid-January 2011. It’s officially Christmas shopping season. Why? Because the stores tell us so. Every single circular has amazing deals on products. Coupon codes, online only sales, 1 day shopping in-store sales, rebates, discounts, free products with a purchase…these deals EXIST and THEY ARE GOOD. It’s just like hell – it exists to all but is often sugar coated in candy red letters so we don’t feel the flames as we fall into its alluring traps. Okay, maybe that’s a bit dramatic but let’s think about this.

Today is November 10th. Christmas is a month and a half away. Have you bought or been tempted to purchase gifts because of a deal you couldn’t pass up? Retailers started early and man they’re good this year.  Falling prices, coupons for every store and black Friday ads circulating since Halloween. The perfect way to stimulate our economy so the stores make money and more and more people end up in accidental debt. Don’t think so? Well, how many people are going to finish the bulk of their Christmas shopping by December 1st and then spend a month not buying anything else when the deals are going to keep getting better? Are you strong enough to not go in the mall for a month during “the best time of the year?” And if you’re daring enough to enter, are you strong enough to resist a 75% off nothing you really need but something you want deal? You may pick up an extra gift or 2 for someone because it’s the “perfect gift.” Or maybe you’ll treat yourself because you’re done shopping for other people.

The stores may seem like they’re helping you out but long-term, are they?

My advice is to do your research before you go shopping, stick to your lists, print out your coupons, use your rebate sites, use your coupon codes, save on the not rushed deliveries but most importantly, if it’s not the absolute perfect gift for the absolute perfect price, wait. It’ll be hard. But it should pay off.

This year before purchasing anything I ask myself these questions:

• Who is it for?
• Will they love it?
• Is it what I would pay if it were full price or am I buying it because it’s on sale?
• Does it exceed the amount I want to/can afford to spend on this person?
• Will it get even cheaper?

I’m not saying don’t shop – I myself have already bought a few presents. What I’m saying is be wise. The stores are not your friends, they’re looking to make money. They don’t care how many times you purchase from their store and whether it’s full price or clearance priced. They don’t care if you use cash or credit card (unless of course it’s THEIR credit card they can charge you interest on). And most importantly, they couldn’t care less if you have a debt/balance in January 2011 that wasn’t there in October 2010.

Wishing you all a conscious shopping season – good luck out there!

I love couponing. I often visit websites that you can print coupons for free (just the cost of paper and ink for your printer) and ocassionally find coupons in magazines. So my collection of coupons is growing. But there are so many times that I see coupons I don’t need or find that a coupon is about to expire that I’ve already printed but won’t end up using. So this is what I’m doing. I’m taking those coupons and as I’m shopping, I put them next to the item. Not hard to do, not timely to do and definitely not costly to do. But imagine how happy someone will be when they go to buy that item and find a coupon sitting there just waiting for them. It’s like putting money in your neighbor’s pocket.

I know some places have bins for coupon swapping but that takes time to go through and sometimes I feel weird taking a coupon or 5 (lol) when I haven’t contributed anything. But this…this idea I like. I challenge you to do the same. Imagine how awesome it would be if a lot of people started doing this? So many people would be blessed.

Want an even CHEAPER way of doing this? I have 1 question for you: Do you get the Sunday newspaper? The newspaper is loaded with coupons and I’m sure you just end up throwing out the ones you don’t need. How about clipping them and bringing them along next time you go grocery shopping or to a pharmacy? CVS, Rite Aid, Walgreens, Walmart, Supermarkets…so many places take coupons.

Have kids? Bonus! You can make a game of it AND teach them about giving and blessing others.

Anyway, I’ll be doing this and I hope you’ll join me.  As with all things, a little can go a long way.